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Title: Fear (1/3): Story 11 in the "Who I Am, What I'll Become" Series

Author: X_tremeroswellian

Email: faithboscorelli1@yahoo.com

Disclaimer: The Angel Investigations gang belongs to Joss Whedon. Clayton Gilman, Trudi, and Dan Wakefield belong to me.

Rating: PG-13 bordering on R for violence, adult language and sexual content.

Spoilers: Up through "Are You Now or Have You Ever Been" for Angel, the entire fourth season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and the first 10 stories in this series, especially the first one, "Illusions" and the tenth one, "Descension."

Timeline: Takes place immediately following "Descension."

Summary: An old friend unexpectedly shows up in L.A. in time to rescue Cordelia; Kate and Wesley realize they are searching for a serial killer.

Distribution: Anyone with previous permission to archive the series may take it without asking. Anyone else, just ask and let me know the link.

Category: Story

Subcategories: Suspense/horror/angst/friendship

Feedback: Motivates me to write more.

Dedication: For Andrew. Thanks for the feedback.

Author's Note I: Okay. People have been asking about what happened to the Roswellians. Since I've written so many Roswell fics in the past, this series is mainly focused on the Angel Investigations crew. There will be more Roswell stories coming, but they won't be as predominate as the Angel ones. I do have about 8 more crossovers planned. I have the entire series planned out (though things can change--this story, for example, wasn't in the original outline for the series), but there will be roughly 38 or so fics in this series as long as I continue to go by the original plans. :)

Author's Note II: Some people also asked whether I was going for a Kate/Wesley pairing. To be honest, I hadn't planned one. This serial killer arc wasn't originally part of the series at all so there was no intent for them to wind up together. In fact, I'd sort of planned a different route for both of them, though now I'm not certain what's going to happen. I am open to opinions/suggestions, if anyone feels like writing and letting me know what you think.



Fear (Part One)

"This isn't a murder case."

Kate looked up at Wesley. "What?"

He handed her a file. She studied it for a moment. The woman who had made the report had been grabbed from behind and dragged into a van where she had been tied up and assaulted. The attacker had left for a short time, in which she had managed to escape and go to the local police department. That had occurred in a town south of L.A. called Blue Mound.

She read over the victim's statement. "When he grabbed me, he said he'd been watching me. He knew my name. He said that it was time for my descension. The man held a knife to my throat and dragged me to a tan van." Kate glanced at Wesley before continuing. "The van was full of torture devices and I knew without a doubt that he was going to kill me..."


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Cordelia's eyes widened in horror as her attacker dragged her to a dark blue van. She had to do something; she had to at least try and get away. He pressed the knife to her throat again, as if he somehow sensed that she might put up a fight. The cold steel against her flesh paralyzed her. "I can't wait to fuck you," he whispered, and she shuddered involuntarily.

Oh, god. I don't want to die, she thought. Not this way. Please, no.

Her attacker kept the knife against her throat with one hand and with the other, he opened the back door of the van. She could see knives and chains and ropes and every instrument of torture ever invented that she'd only seen in her worst nightmares. They were all lined up along the sides of the back of the van. In the middle of the floor there was a pillow and a blanket that were both stained with blood.

Cordelia felt bile rise up in her throat. This is it, she thought wildly. I survived monsters and vampires and a Hellmouth just to become a statistic for some psycho killer.

"It's time for your descension, Cordelia," he whispered into her ear again. He shoved her forward and she stumbled and crashed into the bumper of the van, but quickly turned around to face him, ignoring the pain in her knees. She could see that through the eyeholes of his ski mask, his eyes were an icy shade of blue. He was dressed all in black.

He moved towards her, holding the knife out threateningly. There was no way she could escape. She shrunk away from him, too terrified to scream.

A second later she heard a shout from across the street. Her attacker, startled, turned to look at who had shouted. Someone began running towards them.

Without another moment's hesitation, the masked man grabbed her and forced her into the back of the van. Cordelia groped around, desperately reaching for a weapon to use against him.

He was suddenly shoved away and she scrambled out of the van. She took off running and made it across the street and into the alley before she looked back. Her attacker took off in the opposite direction. She leaned against the wall and tried to focus on breathing. She closed her eyes.

Her rescuer walked towards her. "Hey, are you oka--oh, my god. Cordelia?"

She opened her eyes, trying to focus on his face. It took a few seconds to register, but then she gave him a weak smile. "Hey, Oz," was all she managed to say before she passed out.


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Not a lot got to Kate Lockley. She had witnessed too many horrors, battled too many demons. Literally. But sometimes the worst demon of all turned out to be someone completely human. She felt sick to her stomach as she finished reading over seven cases that were definitely connected.

"All of them were brutally assaulted, and the killer not only slit their throats, but stabbed them, too. And all of the families or friends of the victims reported some possession missing--an item of jewelry, a scarf..."

Wesley held out another file, grimacing. "A witness reported seeing this young woman getting into a tan van with a tall male who had dark blond hair. He assumed they knew each other. Two days later, her body was found in a nearby alley by a homeless man."

"Same M.O.?"

He nodded. "And her sister reported a golden locket missing."

"Trophies," Kate murmured, rubbing her forehead. "Sometimes to remember the murders, a killer will take something belonging to his victims as a souvenir or a trophy."

Wesley shook his head in disgust, his face paler than usual. "Sick bastard."

She nodded in agreement, her own stomach still churning. "You know, we've been at this for hours. I could use a break."

"There's an all-night coffee shop down the street," he told her.

Kate didn't hesitate. "Let's go."

* * *

Part Two

"I can't believe I fainted," Cordelia muttered as she sat in the waiting room at the hospital. Oz sat in the chair next to her, holding a cup of coffee he'd gotten out of a machine.

"You were freaked out. Understandable," he said. "How's your hand?"

She grimaced and held it up. It was already turning a nasty shade of yellowish-green from where her attacker had stepped on it, not to mention the jagged cut that went from her wrist to her pinky finger that was caked with dried blood.

"Should I call someone? Angel or--?"

"No," she said immediately. "Not Angel. Wesley."

He raised an eyebrow. "Wesley? He's here in L.A.?"

Cordelia nodded. She read his pager number aloud and Oz scribbled it down on his hand. "Oz!" she said as he stood up and headed for the pay phone.

"Yeah?"

"Don't tell him what happened, okay? Can you just have him come down here?"

"Sure."

She watched as he turned and headed down the corridor. She leaned back in the uncomfortable plastic chair and closed her eyes. She wondered how long it was going to be before the police showed up so she could make a report. She had asked specifically for Kate Lockley, but the man she spoke to said that Kate had gone on break.

Cordelia opened her eyes again and looked around the crowded room. She had a feeling it was going to be a long wait.

How could I have been so stupid? she wondered.

She should have accepted Trudi's offer to call her a cab. This never would have happened if she had. Never mind. It's over. You're safe now, she thought. A wave of relief washed over her and her eyes drifted shut again.

//"I've been watching you, Cordelia."//

The voice echoed in her mind and she sat up straight, her eyes wide and alert. Whoever it was that had attacked her knew her name. Which probably meant he knew where she shopped, where she worked, where she lived. And he had escaped. Which meant he was still out there somewhere. Watching, waiting. For her.

Cordelia gripped onto the arm of the chair with her uninjured hand and repressed the urge to cry out. She watched the end of the corridor and prayed that Oz would return soon, and that Wesley would answer his pager.

* * * * *

Wesley sat across the booth table from Kate, staring down at the black substance in his mug. Kate was staring out the window, a distant look in her eyes. They had both been silent since they'd gotten there a half-hour ago, both lost in their own thoughts.

He nearly jumped out of his seat when his beeper went off. He quickly reached down and unhooked it from his belt, frowning at the unfamiliar number.

"Everything okay?" Kate asked.

"Well, I'm not sure. The only ones who have my pager number are Cordelia and Angel and Gunn, and an old acquaintance from Sunnydale, but...I don't recognize this number." He looked up at her. "I hate to ask this, but--"

Without a word, she handed him her cellular phone.

He smiled. "Thank you." Wesley quickly dialed the number and waited.

"Hello?"

"Hello? This is Wesley Wyndam-Pryce. I had a page from this number."

"Yeah...this is Oz."

Wesley's eyes widened. "Oz?" he repeated.

"Yeah. I'm here at Los Angeles County General Hospital. Cordelia asked me to call you."

"Cordelia? Is she all right?"

There was a moment of silence. Then, "Could you just come down here?"

"Yes, of course," he answered immediately. "I'll be there." He hung up the phone and handed it back to Kate. Then he stood up and tossed some money on the tabletop. "Something happened. Cordelia's at the hospital. I have to go."

"I'm coming with you," the blond detective responded.

Wesley nodded and led the way.

* * * * *

When Oz returned, he found Cordelia sitting rigid in the same chair, her face pale. "Cordelia? Are you okay?"

When she swallowed hard and looked at him, her eyes were glassy. "Is Wesley coming?"

"Yeah." He sat down next to her. "Should I get a doctor? You're really pale."

Cordelia shook her head but remained quiet. This was weird. He had known Cordelia for years. Granted, they had never been the best of friends or anything, but they had gone to school together for as long as he could remember, and she was *never* this quiet. Or this scared.

The realization made him a little nervous.

Oz realized she was shivering and he quickly took off his coat and wrapped it around her shoulders.

"Thanks," she whispered.

"Sure." He didn't know what else to say so he sat quietly and waited.

* * * * *

Wesley raced through the emergency room doors and into the waiting area, Kate right behind him. He spotted them right away: Cordelia sitting in a plastic chair, Oz's coat wrapped around her shoulders as he stood by the window staring out.

When she saw him, she rose to her feet, and he was surprised to realize she was wearing a fancy red dress. It had been torn in the area around her knees, and had dirt stains, as well. "Wesley!" Her voice was fearful and he rushed to her.

"Cordelia! What happened? Are you all right?" He looked her over carefully, and quickly saw her hand was badly bruised and cut. "Good Lord. What happened?"

"I was attacked," she told him shakily.

Wesley's eyes widened and he reached out and pulled her to him, hugging her tightly. "Are you all right?" All kinds of horrible thoughts began racing through his mind.

She nodded against his shoulder but didn't make an effort to pull away. "Oz showed up. He saved my life."

He looked over Cordelia's head and mouthed a silent thanks to the young man/werewolf, who nodded in return.

"Who attacked you?"

Cordelia pulled away from Wesley and faced Kate. "I--I don't know. He was wearing a ski mask. I didn't recognize the voice."

Wesley kept one hand on her shoulder for support. "Did you call the police?"

She nodded. "They haven't showed up yet." She looked at Kate again. "Are you on duty?"

"I'm always on duty," Kate replied grimly. She glanced around the crowded waiting area. "Let me talk to the hospital staff, see if we can go somewhere more private."

Wesley nodded in agreement and guided Cordelia back to a chair. He sat down next to her. "Have you called Angel?"

"For what? So he can blame me for getting attacked because I was stupid enough to walk alone after dark in L.A.?"

He was taken aback by her bitter tone. "I don't think that Angel would--"

"Wesley, I'm not calling Angel." Her tone left no room for argument.

He frowned. He knew that Cordelia and Angel hadn't been getting along well lately, but it felt wrong to not tell him about what happened. For now, though, he decided not to push the issue. "Okay." He glanced over at Oz, who looked a bit puzzled. He shook his head slightly and Oz nodded. Wesley rested his hand on Cordelia's back and she leaned her head on his shoulder.

Kate returned a few moments later, followed by a nurse who looked a bit upset. "Cordelia Chase? We'll show you to a room," the nurse said.

Wesley glanced at Kate, then put his arm around Cordelia as they walked down the hallway. Oz walked behind them.

The nurse opened a door and motioned for everyone to go inside. Cordelia stepped up and sat down on the examining table. Kate pulled out her notepad as Oz took a seat in one of the two plastic chairs by the table, and Wesley remained standing. The nurse did the standard exam: blood pressure, respiration, weight and height. "The doctor will be in shortly," she promised. Then she disappeared down the hallway again, pulling the door shut behind her.

"Okay, Cordelia. Start at the beginning," Kate said, her voice more gentle than Wesley remembered ever hearing her speak.

"I was at a party with my boyfriend, Clayton Gilman. We were at this club--the Jaded Mirror." She hesitated for a second. "I had a bit of a headache, so I decided to go home. I told Clayton's assistant I was leaving and I walked out. I was over halfway home when someone shoved me to the ground. My purse was open because I wanted to be ready if there were any vampires. My stake rolled away and when I reached for it, the guy stepped on my hand." She held up her injured hand to illustrate.

"Did you notice what kind of shoes he was wearing?"

Cordelia shook her head. "I was in too much pain. I yanked my hand away and before I could do anything, he grabbed me from behind and made me stand up."

At that moment, the door opened and a doctor walked in. "Cordelia Chase?" He didn't even look up to start with. He was studying her chart.

"That's me."

He glanced at her, and then around at the others. "There are way too many people in here. You'll have to leave."

"I'm not going anywhere," Wesley answered immediately.

Oz stood up. "I'll step out for a minute."

"Me too," Kate agreed. "We'll continue as soon as the doctor's through."

Cordelia nodded and they left the room.

The doctor walked over to her and picked up her injured arm. "I'm Doctor Warner. How long ago did this happen?"

"About two hours."

"You need stitches." He pressed down on the bone and Cordelia winced. "Make a fist."

She did so, wincing again.

"It's not broken. How did this happen?"

Cordelia glanced at Wesley and he answered for her. "She was attacked."

"Were you sexually assaulted?" he asked, scribbling something down on her chart.

"No," she answered with a shudder, and Wesley felt immense relief wash over him.

"Any other injuries?"

"No."

"Has the incident been reported to the police?"

"The woman who was in here a moment ago is a detective with the L.A.P.D.," Wesley supplied.

Doctor Warner nodded. "I'm going to write you a prescription for some painkillers. You can have it filled in the drug store down the street. It's open 24 hours. I'll send the nurse back to do the stitches. You'll have those for seven days, and then I want you back here to have them removed. Any questions?"

Wesley wanted to ask him if he was so impersonal with all his patients, but he kept his mouth shut.

Cordelia shook her head. "No."

"All right." Doctor Warner left the room.

Wesley sat down next to Cordelia on the examining table. Kate and Oz came back in a moment later.

Kate glanced at them. "Are you ready to continue?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Okay, you said you were grabbed from behind and he forced you to stand up. What happened next?"

Cordelia swallowed hard and Wesley squeezed her uninjured hand reassuringly. "He covered my mouth with his hand. He was wearing black gloves."

"Did he say anything to you?"

She nodded and he could tell she was struggling to say whatever it was she was about to say. "He said...he said he'd been watching me. He knew my name. And then he said that--it was time for my descension and that we were going to go for a little ride."

Wesley's eyes widened and he and Kate looked at one another. Dread clenched at his stomach.

Cordelia noticed the exchange. "What?"

"Nothing. Go on, Cordelia," Kate encouraged.

She took a deep breath. "He pulled out a knife. And he held it to my throat and he said..." Cordelia suddenly looked like she was going to throw up. She stared down at the ground, her face drained of all color.

Wesley wrapped his arm around her.

"Do you want them to leave the room?" Kate asked softly.

Cordelia shook her head.

"You're sure? If it would make it easier--" Oz spoke up.

"No. I don't want you to go. Either of you," she answered, leaning in to Wesley slightly. A moment later she looked up, her face determined. "He said he would slit my throat and make me drink my own blood while he was--while he was...raping me. That's not the word he said, but..."

Kate nodded. "Got it."

Wesley's stomach churned and he held onto her a little more tightly. If he got his hands on the sick bastard that had tried to hurt Cordelia...the guy wouldn't have the option of a life sentence in prison. He glanced at Oz, who looked just as disgusted as Wesley felt.

"He started dragging me down an alley towards a dark blue van. He opened the back doors to it, and there were all these...knives and ropes and axes in there. He was trying to get me inside when Oz shouted from across the street. He picked me up and shoved me into the van. Oz hit him or something, I don't know, but I got out and I ran."

"And he didn't come after you?"

"No. Oz must have scared him off. He ran in the other direction."

"You said before that he wore a ski mask." Kate looked up from her notes.

Cordelia nodded. "It was dark blue or black. And there were only eye holes in it."

"Did you happen to notice anything unusual about him? What was he wearing?"

"He was dressed in all black. Long-sleeved shirt, black jeans, black gloves. He was tall. Oh, and his eyes were this really weird shade of blue. Kind of like an ice blue."

"Is there anything else that you can remember?"

Cordelia thought for a moment. "Yeah. Yeah, the van...he had this makeshift bed made up in the back. There was a pillow and a blanket, and they both had blood stains on them."

"When he spoke to you...did he have any kind of an accent?"

"No...I don't think so. I mean, I'm not sure. He was whispering."

"What happened after you ran away from him?" Kate asked.

"I ran back to the alley and I tried to catch my breath. Oz followed me...I didn't realize who he was until then. Then I...fainted." She said the last part with disgust in her voice.

"You were in shock. It's okay," Wesley said gently.

"How long were you unconscious?"

"She was only out for a couple of minutes," Oz spoke up.

"Did you hit your head when you fainted?"

Cordelia glanced at Oz. "No."

"I caught her before she fell," he added.

"You said that you dropped your purse during the initial attack. Did you go back and get it?"

"Yeah. It was still there."

"And nothing was missing?" she questioned. Wesley frowned when he realized why Kate was asking that question.

//"Sometimes to remember the murders, a killer will take something belonging to his victims as a souvenir or a trophy."//

"No..." Cordelia looked confused. "I don't think he intended to mug me."

"Then what did you do?"

"We used my cell phone to call a cab. Oz insisted on bringing me to the hospital to have my hand checked out. Then we called the police from the cab. I asked for you, but they said you were on a break. They said they'd meet us at County General but they never showed up."

It was Kate's turn to look disgusted. The disgust quickly turned apologetic. "Don't worry. I'll deal with them," she promised.

The door swung open and the nurse returned, wielding the supplies for stitches.

"Oz, I'll need a statement from you, too," Kate informed him, and he nodded in agreement. She met Wesley's eyes. "We'll wait outside."

"Kate," Cordelia said suddenly, her voice sounding very distant.

"Yeah?"

"This guy...knew who I was. He's going to come after me again, isn't he?" Cordelia looked at Kate.

Kate's face was grim. "I don't know," she answered honestly.

* * *

Part Three

Wesley stepped out into the hallway and immediately locked eyes with Kate, who was talking quietly on her cellular phone. "Oz, would you please stay with Cordelia? I need to speak with Detective Lockley."

Oz glanced back and forth between the two of them. "Sure." He went into the exam room.

Wesley waited until she hung up and then followed Kate a little ways down the hall. "What happens next?" he asked quietly.

She took a deep breath. "Well, I have officers on the scene of the crime. The van was gone, but that's no surprise. So far, they haven't found anything but traces of blood, assumedly Cordelia's since she was the one who was injured. Now we try to get as many details together as we can. Work out a profile on this guy, alert the other police departments in the state, and probably our local FBI branch."

"What can I do?" he asked, determined to help in some way.

"The same thing you did tonight. You're good at research and gathering details. I need you to help me continue going over those case files your friend faxed over."

"Yes, of course." He hesitated. "What about Cordelia?"

"I'd be more worried if he'd taken something of hers. But that's not necessarily a guarantee. Someone should be staying with her just in case. We don't want to take any chances."

Wesley nodded in agreement. "We have to tell her what's going on. She knows that something's not right."

"I agree."

"Excuse me. Detective Lockley?" Wesley and Kate turned around and saw two uniformed police officers standing behind them. "We're here to take a report from a girl named..." He looked at the notepad. "…Cordelia Chase."

Kate's expression hardened. "I already took her statement. She called the police nearly two hours ago. What took you so long to get here?"

The younger officers exchanged a look. "Well, it wasn't an emergency."

Her eyes narrowed. "That's not the point," she said angrily. "I intend to report both of you to Chief Waterson. Go back to the station. Everything's been taken care of."

Wesley glared at the men as they turned and walked away. Just then, Cordelia and Oz stepped out into the hallway.

"All right. I want to know what's going on, and I want to know right now," Cordelia said, her voice demanding but Wesley could sense the fear behind her words.

Kate and Wesley exchanged a look. "Cordelia, Willow faxed over some files of unsolved murders from around the state that match the MO of Leslie Adams' killer," Wesley began.

"We've connected nine of the cases so far. One of them wasn't a murder. The woman who made the report was grabbed from behind and a knife held to her throat as she was forced into the back of a van full of torture instruments. He told her that it was time for her descension and he called her by name," Kate added quietly.

"He assaulted her, but she managed to escape when he left for a few minutes."

"Her description of the man matches yours exactly."

"So what you're telling me is that I was attacked by a serial killer," Cordelia said slowly, her expression unreadable.

Wesley met her eyes. "I think you should move into the Hyperion until we find this man."

"Uh-uh. No way." She shook her head vigorously.

"Cordelia, you said yourself that he knew your name. It's entirely possible that he will come after you again. At least there you'll have Angel and Gunn and--"

"Wesley, I am *not* moving into the Hyperion."

"Well, you're not staying on your own, either," he said flatly. Cordelia may be stubborn, but he wasn't about to budge this time.

"I'm not. I have Dennis," she reminded him.

He gave her a look. "Cordelia--"

"So then you can stay at my apartment."

"I have to assist Detective Lockley with research. We'll have to call Angel."

Cordelia glared at him. "Like he even gives a damn, Wesley. We've seen him all of what? Two? Three times in the past two weeks?"

"Cordelia, there isn't any other option here. I'm not going to let you get killed because you're too proud to-"

"Excuse me. I think I might be able to help."

Wesley had almost forgotten that Oz was standing there.

"I could stay with her," he offered, shrugging.

Cordelia nodded in agreement.

Wesley gave him a grateful look. "Oz, that's kind of you. Thank you." He turned his gaze back to Cordelia. "We need to at least tell Gunn what's going on." Before she could protest, he quickly added, "We may need his assistance."

She sighed. "Fine. But not a word to Angel."

He didn't like it, but he nodded reluctantly.


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"So what's going on with Angel and Cordelia?" Kate asked curiously as she and Wesley sat in chairs at the drug store waiting for Cordelia's painkiller prescription to be filled. "I was under the impression they were pretty good friends."

He sighed and rubbed his forehead. "Angel's been acting...strangely. Sleeping a lot, grouchier than normal...he's been pushing all of us away for no apparent reason."

She frowned deeply and he hoped that he hadn't re-instilled her fear of their vampire friend. "And it's gotten so bad that she doesn't want him to know that she was attacked and nearly killed?"

Wesley glanced at her. "Cordelia and Angel are both very strong-willed, stubborn people. I've seen them argue before, but this...has gotten out of hand. They're barely speaking. I honestly don't know what to do about it."

Kate lowered her voice. "Has she talked to you about what happened a few weeks ago?"

He blinked in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"About that shape-shifting alien." She shifted in her seat a bit uncomfortably. "She was clinically dead for a few minutes. And it was a very violent...death."

"She hasn't said anything. Why?"

"Well, it's just--Cordelia was attacked again tonight, and threatened with the same kind of weapon that was used then."

Wesley caught onto what she was saying. "You think she may need to talk about what happened."

"I get the feeling that Cordelia doesn't open up to people about things like that easily." Kate took a deep breath and looked away. "And I know from experience that if you hold all that inside, eventually...it's going to have to come out."

He absorbed her words. "Yes, that's probably true," he said with a sigh.

She stood up and glanced around the aisle of juice drinks. "Keep an eye on her. Sometimes the most destructive person isn't someone that's trying to hurt you." Kate looked at him. "Sometimes the most destructive person of all is yourself."


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Cordelia walked up and down the aisles of the drug store restlessly. Oz was looking at magazines and Wesley and Kate were in the waiting area by the pharmacy section.

Her hand was throbbing but she did her best to ignore it, as well as all the thoughts swirling in her mind. She racked her brain, trying to remember if she needed any groceries or anything. Might as well get them while she was out. She grabbed a couple of Lean Cuisine dinners out of the freezer section, along with a gallon of vanilla non-fat frozen yogurt. She started to walk towards the pharmacy, but a bottle of pills on the shelf in front of her made her stop.

No-Doz.

Without a second thought, she grabbed the bottle just as someone announced over the store's intercom that the prescription for Cordelia Chase was ready.

Great, she thought bitterly. Just announce the fact that I'm here to everyone.

Cordelia glanced around, relieved to see that no one was behind her. In fact, other than her and the others, the store was pretty much deserted. She felt a little better. But not much.

Wesley smiled at her tentatively as she walked up to the counter with her things. She was glad that he didn't follow her up there. She set her food and the No-Doz on the counter and addressed the pharmacist. "I'm Cordelia Chase."

He smiled. "Okay. Will this be all for you?"

"Yep."

"I need you to sign here." He held out a clipboard and a pen. "Do you have any questions?"

"No." She hesitated, realizing that the hand she wrote with was her injured hand. She gingerly picked up the pen and scratched her name out, grimacing the entire time. He rang up her items and handed her the sack. "Thanks," she mumbled.

"Have a nice night," the pharmacist said cheerfully.

"Yeah. Right," Cordelia said under her breath.


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"I'm going to change clothes," Cordelia said as soon as they walked through the doors at the Hyperion. She hurried down the hall and disappeared into the room she'd kept free for a few of her own clothes whenever she stayed over.

Wesley glanced at Kate, and then Oz, and then motioned for them to follow as he walked up to the front desk where Gunn was sitting.

"Any news on this serial killer?" Gunn asked immediately.

He nodded grimly. "Where's Angel?"

"Same place he's been for the past three weeks. In his room."

"Yes, well..." Wesley glanced at Kate. "Gunn, this is Detective Kate Lockley, and this is an old friend, Oz. Detective, Oz, this is Charles Gunn."

Gunn nodded his head at them both. "Should I go get Angel?"

"No, actually, we're here to talk to you."

The younger man looked at him suspiciously. "About the serial killer."

"Yes. And about Cordelia."

"And why aren't we telling Angel?"

"Because Cordelia was attacked tonight."

Gunn's eyes widened. "Attacked? She all right?"

"I'm fine."

Wesley turned to see Cordelia standing behind him, now dressed in a long-sleeved purple blouse and blue jeans, and a lightweight black leather coat. Her hair had been pulled back in a hasty ponytail.

"Wait a minute. You were attacked by the serial killer?"

"I survived. No big deal." She shrugged it off.

"It is a big deal," Wesley said quietly. He turned back to face Gunn. "He knew her name."

"And you're thinking that--"

"He's going to come after her again."

Gunn nodded. "Got that part. What I don't understand is why we aren't telling Angel."

"Why you aren't telling me what?"

They all turned towards where Angel was descending the stairs. Cordelia quickly shoved her injured hand into her coat pocket.

Wesley and Kate exchanged a look. "We've managed to connect Leslie Adams' murder with a string of unsolved cases throughout California," he said quickly.

"There are eight murders so far and one attempted," Kate added.

"So why weren't you going to tell me..." his voice trailed off as his gaze turned to Oz. He did a double-take. "Oz? What are you doing here?"

"Just visiting."

Wesley glanced at Gunn and warned him with a look to keep his mouth shut about Cordelia. The younger man nodded slightly to tell him he understood.

Angel shook his head and glanced at Cordelia but didn't say anything. She wouldn't even meet his gaze.

"Anyway, we just stopped in to let Gunn know that the killer is definitely still in the area, and to be especially careful while patrolling. He's driving a dark van, or at least we think, given his encounter with the survivor of his attack. The van's loaded with knives and ropes and axes." Wesley took a deep breath and ran one hand through his hair nervously.

"The guy's big into torture and pain," Kate elaborated.

Gunn raised an eyebrow. "You sure he's human? No offense," he added, glancing at Angel.

Cordelia looked at Gunn. "Pretty sure," she said, her voice low.

Wesley watched as Angel's eyes followed Cordelia and the vampire frowned deeply. He sighed inwardly. Keeping this from Angel was a bad idea, he just knew it was. Angel was smart. It wouldn't take much to figure out that something had happened, and it was only a matter of time before the truth came out. And when the time came that Angel found out the truth, he was going to be more than a bit upset. He would be absolutely livid. Even more so when he realized they'd all lied to him about it.

Wesley wasn't looking forward to that time at all.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Angel kept his eyes on Cordelia. He couldn't place exactly what was wrong, but he knew there was something. She was standing with both hands in her coat pockets and refused to look at him.

One glance at Wesley, who was nervously running his hand through his hair, confirmed his suspicions.

Then he moved his gaze to Gunn, who kept his usual calm demeanor while Kate and Wesley discussed the serial killer they were looking for. Gunn wasn't as easy for him to read as Cordelia and Wesley; probably due to the fact that he had known the latter so long. But even so, he had a gut feeling that he was the only one in the dark about whatever it was that was going on.

He tried to remember his last conversations with Cordelia and Wesley. Cordelia had mentioned she'd had trouble sleeping lately, but denied anything being wrong. Maybe it had something to do with that new guy she'd been seeing. Angel's eyes narrowed and he studied her more carefully. She was a bit paler than usual, and her hair was pulled back in a sloppy ponytail. And she almost never wore jeans. Other than that, she appeared calm and her face was virtually expressionless. Of course, since she wouldn't look at him, he couldn't see her eyes. If he could, he'd be able to really tell if something was wrong. Her eyes were very expressive; at least, to those who bothered to take notice.

Something pulled at the back of his mind. A far off voice that seemed to be beckoning him back upstairs to his room.

Darla.

He didn't know why he was dreaming about her so much lately. Sure, he'd been used to the occasional dream about his sire throughout the years. After all, they'd spent nearly 150 years together roaming over Europe and throughout the entire Eastern half of the world. But he'd never dreamt of her so frequently or so...vividly.

If he didn't know better, he'd think she was actually still alive.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Hello, Lindsey."

Lindsey McDonald looked up from his desk and smiled. "Hello, Darla. How have you been?"

"Good...very good." The beautiful blond smiled back at him.

"Glad to hear it." He stood up and motioned her to a chair. She accepted the offer and languidly and gracefully dropped into it, crossing one leg over the other. "How are things going?"

"You mean with Angel, of course."

"Of course." He liked this woman. She was very perceptive, very intelligent...very deadly.

"Everything is going wonderfully, Lindsey." Her eyes twinkled and she winked at him. "He's putty in my hands."

"No problems with his sidekicks?"

"Hardly any interference. I thought you said they would be difficult to work around." She almost sounded disappointed.

Lindsey frowned. He had expected it to be difficult to pry the vampire away from his friends. "Well, perhaps you're just very persuasive, Darla," he said, leaning forward.

She smiled at the thought. "I still hold a great amount of influence over him. Ironic, isn't it? He killed me but he still wants me."

"Very ironic," Lindsey said, though he didn't really agree. Darla didn't make it difficult for a man to want her. "Then I take it everything's on schedule?"

"Perfectly."

"Excellent," he whispered as their eyes met.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Are you sure you won't stay at the Hyperion?" Wesley asked Cordelia softly as he pulled her aside outside of her apartment building. Kate and Oz stood a few feet away, looking around. "We can take you back now, tell Angel everything. I know the two of you aren't getting along, but he would protect you." His voice had a pleading tone to it.

Cordelia felt guilty for forcing Wesley into the middle of her conflicts with Angel, but she wasn't about to stay with Angel for any extended period of time. "I'm sure. I'll be fine, Wesley. Oz is going to stay with me, and Dennis will make sure I'm okay, too."

"This is very serious, Cordelia," he began.

"I know it is," she said quietly. "And I know that you're trying to make sure I stay safe. But I'll be safe. Really. I promise."

Wesley sighed and she hugged him. He held her tightly. "If anything happened to you, I could never forgive myself."

She rested her head on his shoulder. "Thank you for caring," she whispered.

He kissed her forehead. "If you need anything, call me. I'll be here immediately." He gazed at her. "I don't feel right leaving you here."

Cordelia was touched by his concern. She had been very wrong to doubt his friendship before and she saw that now. "You go be Mr. Research Guy. Find this psychopath before he hurts anyone else."

Wesley nodded and motioned Kate and Oz over.

"You ready?" Kate asked him.

"Yes." He hesitated as she headed for the car. He looked at Oz. "Take care of her," he said quietly.

Oz nodded. "I will."

Cordelia smiled at him. "I'll be fine."

"Don't hesitate to call if you need anything," Kate told her.

"Thank you," she said sincerely. She watched as Kate and Wesley got into the squad car and drove away.

"Cordelia?"

She turned to look at Oz. "Yeah?"

"Who's Dennis?"


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cordelia poured herself a cup of tea, and then one for Oz. "So how's Willow?" she asked as she reached for the sugar.

When he didn't respond right away, she turned to look at him. His face was ridden with pain. "We broke up."

She nearly dropped the sugar bowl. "What?" Cordelia stared at him. Had she heard him correctly? Oz and Willow had broken up? By the pain that remained etched on his features, she knew she'd heard right. "I'm sorry...I had no idea. I don't really keep in touch with...you know. Everyone back there."

"Me either," he said wryly.

Cordelia felt a sudden, familiar sadness sweep over her, but it wasn't for herself. It was a deep empathy for the guy sitting across from her at her kitchen table; a guy that had once been a friend, or at least, one of the closest people she could tentatively call a 'friend' back in Sunnydale. She decided that dredging up ancient history wasn't the best of ideas at that point. "So...what brought you to L.A.?"

He almost smiled. "I've been travelling a lot. Seeing the world."

"And you ended up back here?"

"Yep. Thought I'd swing by and see how you and Angel were."

"Well, I'm really glad you did," she said seriously. "Thanks for helping me out tonight. You did save my life."

Oz nodded. "Glad I could help." He glanced around. "What happened to that other guy? Doyle?"

Cordelia looked away. "He died. Almost a year ago. Not long after you were here last time, actually."

"Sorry," he said sincerely.

She nodded. "Me too. He was a good friend." Cordelia paused, really not wanting to dwell on sad things. "How long are you planning on hanging around L.A.?"

He shrugged. "No set plan. But if you guys need help, I can stick around."

"Well, I think we could use all the help we can get," she said quietly.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cordelia sat on top of her bedspread lotus-style. She glanced out the window into the dark night.

Serial killer.

A serial killer has been watching me.

How long has he been watching? she wondered. A few days? A month? Since I came to L.A.?

Her stomach churned, but she couldn't stop the thoughts.

Is it someone I know? Someone I've talked to? Trusted?

Was he watching right now? Maybe spying on her with some hidden video camera? She'd seen things like that happen before, and not only in movies and on The X-Files. Had he watched her undress, seen her in the shower?

Cordelia shuddered, and jerked the comforter up around her body tightly. Her hand ached at the sudden movement and she bit her lip to hold back tears. She began to shiver as she fought off sleep. She didn't want to close her eyes. She was afraid of the things she would see in her dreams. She didn't want to go to sleep, not now. Even though Oz was in the guestroom right across the hall and she knew logically that she was safe for the time being, she didn't feel safe.

The whole room was too damned dark. "Dennis?" she whispered. The lamplight flooded the room almost instantly. "Thanks."

Even with the light on she felt sleepy. No, she wasn't sleepy...she was down right tired. She needed to sleep. But not now. Cordelia sat up and reached for the bottle of No-Doz she had set beside her bed. She only considered it for a moment before she unscrewed the cap with her uninjured hand and quickly swallowed down two of the pills. No serial killer was going to catch her off guard. At least not tonight. She could stay awake as long as she had to.

The End

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